What separates Kobe's remark from ordinary judgement is that he's naming something often left unspoken: incompatibility isn't moral failure, just radical difference in how two people experience time and effort. A high-performing surgeon and a contentedly underemployed artist genuinely *cannot* understand each other's choices because they're operating from different reward systems entirely—not because one is right and one is wrong. The insight cuts deeper than "work harder," suggesting instead that some gaps in human understanding aren't bridges to build but chasms to accept. This matters because it frees us from exhausting missionary work, trying to convince someone their entire orientation to life is mistaken.